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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22634878">Mise en Place</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/MoosesnMaple/pseuds/fr0sted_fox'>fr0sted_fox (MoosesnMaple)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Kingdom Hearts</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - Summer Camp, Baker! Riku (Kingdom Hearts), Camp Counselor! Sora (Kingdom Hearts), Drinking &amp; Talking, Gay Disaster Riku, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Recovery from trauma, it's mostly fluff I swear</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-02-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 10:21:51</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>13,143</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22634878</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/MoosesnMaple/pseuds/fr0sted_fox</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Mise en Place - Everything in its place.</p>
<p>Riku needed a change, and working as a baker at a summer camp seems like exactly the type of change he needed. Anything to get away from a home filled with misery. If he happens to meet a brown-haired, blue-eyed counselor there who steals his heart in an instant, then what can he really do? </p>
<p>aka: Riku blushes - the fanfic</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Riku/Sora (Kingdom Hearts)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>47</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Mise en Place</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This has been almost a year in the making and I'm so excited to be sharing it with you all! A big thanks to all of the friends that helped me edit, to Kampfhomo, who drew the lovely art you'll see later in the fic and to Besin and Cap and everyone else who helped to keep the Rogue Nebula ball rolling when things imploded, we wouldn't have made it here without you!<br/>A quick note - Riku is 21 in the fic, and all the other's ages are based relative to him, with no one in the main cast being under 19.  I am Canadian and have followed Ontario's drinking age in this fic because that is what I am used to, so there are 19 year olds drinking casually later in the fic, but I did not tag as underage for the aforementioned reason.</p>
<p>I hope you enjoy!!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Cut, weigh, rest. Cut, weigh, rest. The now familiar rhythm he had fallen into over the past couple of weeks was comforting, easy to get lost in. The repetitive motions leaving Riku in almost a trance. The hour was late, most of the kitchen staff cleared out for the evening, leaving Riku alone — the way he liked it, honestly. The rhythm of making bread was peaceful; meditative. It was strange to be here, somewhere Riku wouldn't have seen himself before, but ends needed meeting, and children needed feeding. He had never considered himself much of a child person, or even a people person really, but there was something endearing about the excitement they had for the little sweets he made for dessert. The bread as well – though to a lesser extent.</p>
<p>He guessed he had Mickey to thank for this new chapter, for encouraging baking as a hobby to soothe his mind, and for getting him this job in the first place. It was exactly what Riku had needed, much to his surprise. A kitchen job was anything but luxurious, especially one at a summer camp, but it got him away and really, that’s all that mattered. Late nights didn’t matter when sleep was as elusive as a shooting star. But whether it was the exhausting work of a kitchen job, the meditation of making bread, or the peace of the woods surrounding the camp, Riku had been resting easier, sleeping just the slightest bit deeper.</p>
<p>Squish, shape, proof. Squish, shape, proof. Mickey popped in after he had finished ordering supplies for the next delivery, checking to see if Riku needed help finishing up. Maybe he did, but he refused anyway, not yet tired enough to want to be done. Cleaning could be done while the bread was proofing, as well as any small details needing to be put in place for the next day. If all else failed he could sit on the dock and watch the waves gently roll in from the nearby lake, as nothing soothed Riku’s active mind like the soft sounds of water cresting against the shore.</p>
<p>The workbench and surrounding areas were spotless, and the bread was ready to be baked. It was amazing really, how much the bread changed from start to finish. Each component is integral to the final product, as without one simple thing it simply would not be. Infinitely complex, yet deceptively simple; a delicious paradox.</p>
<p>A low thud startled Riku out of his concentration. Someone was in the dining hall, and although it was allowed, it was incredibly unusual for such a late hour. Riku slowly peered out the kitchen door, attempting to catch a glimpse of whoever wanted a late-night snack. There, near the assortment of fresh fruit and granola bars, stood an angel. Not really – but to Riku he may as well have been. He stood there, spiky brown hair, blue eyes so deep Riku could get lost in them, precariously balancing an armful of apples, seemingly trying to put them back to rights. He wore a red camp shirt and baggy shorts, but that did not stop him from being the most beautiful man Riku had ever seen.</p>
<p>Riku slowly turned back to the kitchen, not wanting to bring attention to himself in his dirty kitchen clothes. The bread was almost ready, he justified to himself, it definitely was not because he was sweaty and smelly from being in the hot kitchen all day. Indeed the bread was almost ready; he could smell it in the air. It was a subtle change from the smell of half baked bread, slightly toastier, a bit less yeasty, but Mickey claimed he couldn’t smell it.</p>
<p>He couldn’t get that boy out of his head, no matter how hard he tried. He was distracted. So much so that he burnt his hand on a hot tray he had carelessly left out. A silly mistake to be sure, but it was hard to curse himself too much when those blue eyes still occupied his mind’s eye. Maybe next time he would introduce himself, assuming there was a next time. He had the camp’s shirt on, meaning he was most likely a counselor or something of the sort, but it was a big camp and Riku worked through the evening mealtimes, preferring to eat while he worked so he didn’t have to pause in the middle of something important. The mysterious angel likely wouldn’t be interested in men anyway, let alone interested in Riku.</p>
<p>With the last of the bread out of the oven and ready for breakfast the next morning, Riku flicked off the kitchen lights and made his way to his cabin, breathing in the sweet nighttime air and staring at the stars as he walked. Distantly, he could hear the waves in the lake roll against the shore, it was a calming sound, one that never failed to ease his restless mind. He fell asleep quickly that night, a clumsy brunette central in his sleeping mind.</p>
<p>////</p>
<p>A chance encounter one morning before Riku was headed into the kitchen found him reconnecting. During his normal morning yoga routine, a shock of red hair nearly knocked him to the ground, quite literally in fact. A dear childhood friend from Radiant Garden, who had moved away many years ago but had never been forgotten. Kairi. The reunion was… interesting, to say the least. They had kept in touch throughout the years, albeit very loosely. Their main communication had been through emails, hastily sent with the promise of a lengthy follow up that never came. Riku had a vague knowledge that Kairi would be working outdoors over the summer, and so her responses may come at even more of a snail’s pace than usual, but he had never imagined the possibility that he would have run into her here, of all places.</p>
<p>Despite the lapses in communication, the sometimes long silences between both parties when life just got in the way, Kairi was genuinely excited to see Riku, as he was to see her.</p>
<p>“Riku?! Is that really you? You didn’t tell me you would be here! When did you arrive? What are you doing here?? When did your hair get so long??? We need to catch up. Now.” Kairi’s words spilled out in a rush, rattling off questions as soon as they had popped into her mind. She stared wide-eyed at Riku in disbelief as she paused to catch her breath, she couldn’t believe the man in front of her was actually there.</p>
<p>“Yeah, Kai, it’s really me. I arrived a few weeks ago, I’ve been keeping to myself for the most part. I’m working in the kitchen with the baker, and I don’t know; I just let it do its own thing most days.” Riku doled out answers in quick succession to each of her questions while smiling in quiet exasperation at her enthusiasm, though sharing it himself. “How’ve you been? What are you doing all the way out here?”</p>
<p>“I’m really great Riku, even better now that I know you’re here. And I have the honour of teaching the little children attending the illustrious Camp Twilight archery.” She spoke dramatically, with a slight sarcastic edge but had a wide grin on her face that betrayed her enjoyment of her job, “It is scary at times though,” She admitted sheepishly, “The first couple of days with all of the new kids are nerve-wracking, at least until they learn how to aim… but some of them never do.” Kairi laughed and ruffled the hair at the back of her head. “Speaking of which, I should really be going, no child should be left alone around a bow, especially not a group of them, because <em>apparently</em> it’s a good idea to have twenty kids learning archery for the first time with only one overseer right now.” She griped and turned to walk towards the archery range, “We should meet up later though! I want to introduce you to all of my other friends! I’m sure they’ll love you.” Before she could escape him completely, Riku pulled Kairi into a crushing hug, earning him a small startled squeak and an equally rib-busting hug in return.</p>
<p>“It’s good to see you again, and please don’t get shot by a twelve-year-old. If not for me, then for your pride.” He spoke teasingly, but affection laced his voice. Riku had missed her more than he would like to admit. “I’ll meet you by the dining hall when you’re done.”</p>
<p>“Got it! You better not flake out on me. This camp is not as big as it seems, and I <em>will</em> find you.” Riku smiled and waved as Kairi finally ran off, not doubting that she would go after him if he missed catching up and meeting her friends.</p>
<p>Riku filled the rest of the morning with a quiet hike through the woods surrounding the camp, musing on his chance encounter. The odds of having found Kairi here were nearly impossible, a happy coincidence that Riku had a hard time wrapping his mind around. Good things like this didn’t just happen to him. A chance meeting with a dear childhood friend was the type of thing to happen in a movie, not in his messed-up life. But he would take it for what it was and do his best not to ruin it as he had with so many other things.</p>
<p>Kairi’s friends were… nice, though some of them could be a bit loud. Loudness was something to be expected, needed even, for people working at a summer camp. They seemed to be a mix of many different friend groups that slowly coalesced over time. There was no epicenter to this group, no one person they all rallied around, just many different mutual friends all haphazardly coming together. He found a kindred spirit in a girl with long blonde hair and rainbow lowlights named Namine. She had a quiet calm about her, an eye in the storm of activity around them. A little while into what amounted to a meet and greet, a brunette ball of energy bounded into the small clearing they had met up in, calling Kairi’s name. Kairi’s expression brightened as she called to the clumsy angel that had been haunting Riku’s dreams. Sora… his name matched his sky-blue eyes. Kairi handled the introductions, explaining that she had met him after she had moved to Destiny Islands, and they had become fast friends. He looked at Riku with a gaping mouth, a look of shock crossing his beautiful face.</p>
<p>“You’re so – so cool!” The exclamation bubbled from his lips as he skidded to a halt in front of Riku and Kairi. Riku felt a blush rise on his face, he could only hope that it wasn’t too apparent, it didn’t seem smart to show weakness in front of a being this breath-taking. “Kai! You didn’t tell me that your old friend from Garden was so… THIS!?” Sora gestured erratically at Riku while Riku continued to lose the battle against his blush and Kairi giggled at the fact that anyone could find Riku cool, especially with a blush that vibrant marking his face.</p>
<p>Sora was gone the moment he saw Riku. He was so tall and his blue-green eyes seemed to pierce straight through to Sora’s soul. The way his face lit up when he laughed at Kairi’s jokes made Sora’s heart soar. It just wasn’t fair for one guy to be so pretty! There was no way his long silver hair was natural, was there? He was so hot, but there’s no way Sora could say that out loud. What was the opposite of hot? Cool! That’s still a compliment but much less embarrassing than hot.</p>
<p>The crowd was slowly beginning to overwhelm Riku, but after observations and introductions, some things he had seen earlier in the spring during his first few weeks at camp began to make more sense. That boy in the dining hall singing in a monotone voice about pain being the only thing that is the only thing that’s real? That was Roxas, preparing a talent show for the kids. The other staff member walking silently through the dining hall with upbeat pop music from nearly a decade ago blasting muffled through his backpack? Hayner, after losing a bet to Roxas. <em>Allegedly</em>. It was new for Riku to have so many people happy to see him, greeting him whenever they happened to walk past, asking how his day was. It was… nice, if a little mind-boggling to have so many people be acquainted with him. After Kairi had left Radiant Garden, he hadn’t had many close friends, he had found it was easier to just keep to himself. Fewer friends meant fewer people to disappoint. Pushing others away was hard, he felt adrift most days with no one to anchor or ground him, but it was what he chose for himself.</p>
<p>////</p>
<p>In the days following their first real meeting, Sora started to sit in the kitchen with Riku, integrating himself into Riku’s evenings and watching as he worked away at whatever needed to be made, sometimes asking questions about what was being made, or the menu for the coming days, but usually just chatting about everything and anything.</p>
<p>“Y’know, it’s like you mess something up once and they never let you live it down for the rest of your life! Nursing programs are competitive, I always try my best in class they know that! But according to them I wasn’t accepted because ‘Sora can’t count’. It’s not my fault those stairs were hard to count! They even tried to make it into an urban legend around town. I know they’re just joking around but it really gets to me sometimes…” Sora sighed and slumped in his seat, a defeated look crossing his face.</p>
<p>“Sora…” Riku trailed off, unable to put his thoughts into words. Why would anyone say something like that to Sora? He was the most sincere and kind person Riku had ever met, he couldn’t imagine how anyone could intentionally put Sora down like that. There was a line between friendly ribbing and jabbing directly at the spots that would most hurt someone.</p>
<p>“Oh well,” Sora quickly turned to Riku with a smile plastered on his face, it seemed forced, a bit too tight around his eyes, “I’m gonna re-apply and get in this time! One rejection isn’t gonna tear me down forever, because I have friends who believe in me!”</p>
<p>“You’re right Sora. You do have friends who believe in you,” <em>Like me</em>. He had known Sora for so little time, but he already knew Sora was going to go far. He had a strong heart and no shortage of drive. “But some of them don’t sound like that great friends, shouldn’t they be able to tell when they’ve said something that hurts you?” Riku frowned slightly as he measured out ingredients for his cake batter, still not liking the thought of anyone making Sora frown. But who knows, if he had met Sora a few years earlier, he could have ended up being one of those people. Riku had not been the best to his peers in his youth, being quick to anger at the smallest provocations and focusing on others’ insecurities to hide his own. He had grown since that time, but the fear of regressing back to it still lingered.</p>
<p>“It just seems like that because you haven’t met them! I’m just complaining too much, they’re really not that bad. And I give back as good as I get it! I don’t let them off <em>that</em> easy.” Sora crossed his arms and puffed up his chest, sitting straight in his chair, trying to look like a tough guy but not quite pulling it off. Riku smiled softly and laughed in a small exhale at Sora’s antics,</p>
<p>“Whatever you say Sora. I’m sure you’re no damsel in distress.”</p>
<p>“Of course I’m not, Riku!” Sora exclaimed indignantly, nearly leaping out of his seat in an attempt to look Riku in his eyes, a passion burning in his own, “I’m one of the strongest of all of my friends! Except maybe Roxas but…” He leaned in and started to whisper conspiratorially, “I’m not sure he even feels pain? No matter what I do he never slows down! But he’s the only one who can beat me one on one! Whenever we spar the others have to team up to try and take me down.” He finished boastfully, pride at his strength shining in his expression. Riku eyed him up carefully, an eyebrow raised.</p>
<p>“I think I could take you.” He said bluntly, turning to the mixer, focusing more on his batter than on Sora’s gaping mouth and wide-eyed shock at his statement.</p>
<p>“You can’t just say that with nothing to back it up, Riku! Just because you have those buff baking biceps doesn’t mean you could beat me. I’ll have you know that I can be slippery when I want to!”</p>
<p>“I’m sure you can be, Sora.” The words slipped out before Riku had a chance to think, and an expression of immediate regret crossed his face in a flash, appearing one second and disappearing in the next.</p>
<p>“And what’s that supposed to mean?” Sora said, leaning towards Riku with his hands on his hips and an exaggeratedly inquisitive look on his face.</p>
<p>“Nothing, Sora, don’t worry about it,” Riku didn’t exactly know what he meant by it either, but it sounded too close to flirting for him to acknowledge and he turned to busy himself with evening out the cake batter in the pan. It wasn’t exactly needed, but any reason to not look into Sora’s questioning blue eyes was a good one.</p>
<p>“You better be prepared to back up these claims of yours, mister. Next time we have a tournament, you are invited so I can kick your butt!”</p>
<p>“Tournament...?” Riku looked at Sora questioningly, getting lost in the other’s enthusiasm.</p>
<p>“Yeah! It’s when a bunch of us get together and fight with the wooden swords we let the kids use! It’s like struggle, I guess. Except a lot less organized and a lot more fun. We usually do it a bit later in the summer, but don’t let that make you lazy, ‘cause I’ll be waiting to beat you!” Sora wagged his finger warningly in Riku’s face, intent on driving home the point. Riku just laughed and nodded his head.</p>
<p>“Alright, Sora, I’ll take you up on that. Don’t want you getting too big for your britches now.” The evening started to wind down after this, Riku baking off the cake, to be decorated the next day, and Sora heading back to make sure his campers were back in time for their evening snack and activity.</p>
<p>Having Sora around the kitchen so much changed the mood, the evenings seemed less stressful with Sora around. There was still just as much work to do, but Sora’s presence made the time pass faster, kept the atmosphere lighter. Mickey left them to themselves, usually busying himself with some other task that needed to be done, while giving Riku the space to connect with his new friend. Every time he heard Riku laugh, his heart felt a little lighter, and he became a little less worried about the young man. Mickey would always be there to help him, but he needed friends his own age to encourage him to act his age and let go. He was still so young but mature beyond his years, forced to grow up faster than any child should. What Mickey wouldn’t do to lighten the load on Riku’s shoulders, but he had done what he could. It was on Riku to reach out now, to forge the bonds that would strengthen his heart and help him to heal, to clear away his doubts and fears.</p>
<p>////</p>
<p>Riku’s parents hadn’t been cruel, not really. Neglectful maybe, harsh for sure, but the word cruel never seemed to fit. They had never raised a hand to him, never used physical force against him, though twistedly, sometimes he wishes they had, it would have been easier to understand, in a way, than the emotional manipulation and belittlement he had gone through. Sometimes he thought he should have done more, should have known how wrong the treatment he received was, but how was a child to know that they were being mistreated when it was all they had ever known?</p>
<p>His mind was the only thing of worth he had to them, and even then, they took every opportunity to tell him when he wasn’t using it, and that’s right, he didn’t think when he made that mistake, what was he even good for anyways? Sure, he was smart academically, but he lacked common sense, then they would give him a look. That look. Disappointment, hurt, and incredulousness all wrapped into one. Like every problem was his fault and how dare he make a small mistake and hurt them like that. How dare he be a child and mess something up, rather than be a perfect object that never does anything but also never does any wrong. They would never say those words aloud though. No, to the rest of the family and anyone around they were the perfect loving family with a prodigal son, because they were such good parents and raised him so well, not because school was his only escape from the suffocating home and constant disappointment. If he did well enough in school, maybe they would find more things about him to be proud of.</p>
<p>As he grew older, he recognized the way he was being treated was wrong, but still, they hadn’t hit him, words and looks didn’t leave a mark. It wasn’t serious enough to warrant calling someone about. His parents just wanted what was best for him. They loved him. They didn’t show it well but they loved him because that’s what parents are supposed to do.</p>
<p>They were too young when they had him, he understood eventually. They were too young and so he had to grow up too fast, spending more time than a child should on his own. He had to be mature when they would not, and take care of himself when they would not. At times he felt like little more than a butler, responding to his parents’ whims and demands in an instant, or else be punished. If a cupboard wasn’t organized to their liking, they would loudly pull everything out and call him to clean it up, no matter the time of day. As he grew older, he was lucky if he got to go out with friends, as his parents preferred him at their beck and call.</p>
<p>It was hard to separate sometimes, the person Riku was, and the person his parents tried to make him be. How much of Riku was because of them? How much of his personality their negligent nurture over his own natural being? He didn’t want any part of them contaminating his being, but could he escape it? Who was he without the traits they unknowingly nurtured within him? He had moved out of that house as soon as he could and since then he had slowly been getting to know himself again. Learning what parts were intrinsically him. They had had power over him for so long, too long. Maybe they loved him, in some twisted way that equated usefulness to love, but Riku had learned that usefulness has nothing to do with love. A person does not have to be useful to be loved, Riku didn’t have to be useful to be worthy of love; he just had to be Riku. This truth was something often repeated to himself on the difficult days, when his best didn’t seem good enough and the person he used to be seemed to take over his mind.</p>
<p>Mickey had helped to pull him out of that hole, a chance encounter on a bad day, the kind of day where any loud noise made his heart race and put him on high alert for a call of his name that would never come. Mickey had showed him the calming meditation of baking bread, and never once raised his voice, or expressed disappointment if Riku had messed up. Each mistake only an opportunity to learn. Mistakes had happened, but Mickey had just seemed to know, had seen the tenuous hold Riku had over himself, a boy constantly on the edge of breaking, clenching his fists to hold back emotions he felt were irrational and unwarranted, despite the pain he had lived through. Mickey helped to give Riku the resources he needed to find someone to talk to, someone on the outside to help him process his feelings and regain control over his own life and Riku didn’t know if he could ever repay him for that.</p>
<p>////</p>
<p>The kitchen was quickly becoming busier as the summer picked up and more and more children began to flood into the camp. The full kitchen staff had all arrived and there were many new faces for Riku to begin to get to know. He was only really there in the evenings, but it would have been rude not to try to know them at least casually. Some of the others though, who had been there since the spring, were a bit… friendlier with Riku than he may have liked at times.</p>
<p>Vanitas walked casually towards Riku, a smirk on his face and a small bowl in hand, with a perfect scoop of something brilliantly yellow-orange sitting inside. “Yo, Riku, we got some mango sorbet from one of our suppliers to try, you want some?” Riku eyed the supposed sorbet suspiciously, not entirely trusting Vanitas, though with the hot weather made a cool treat sound very enticing. “C’mon, just try some! Have I ever given you a reason not to trust me?” Yes. He had. Many times. “Don’t be a chicken Riku, it’s just sorbet,” That settled it. Riku wasn’t about to be called a coward over a little sorbet. He ripped the bowl from Vanitas’ hands, pride driving him to take a large spoonful, without taking the time to note the unusually tepid temperature of the bowl, or how the “sorbet” had not begun to melt into thin, watery liquid, but into something thicker, more viscous. There was a beat of silence after Riku shoved the spoonful in his mouth, a slow realization dawning over Riku’s quickly paling face, Vanitas slowly beginning to shake and fold into himself with barely withheld laughter. Riku sprinted to the nearest trash can, sputtering and spitting whatever Vanitas had just fed him into the garbage. The taste wasn’t terrible, but the texture was slightly slimy and indescribably just “ick”.</p>
<p>“Was that- “</p>
<p>“Egg yolks? Yupp.” Vanitas smirked at Riku’s dumbfounded expression, “Don’t worry though, they shouldn’t make you sick. We got a couple cartons of them by mistake on the last order.” This revelation only got Vanitas a venomous look in return.</p>
<p>“This is the last time I will ever trust you, Vanitas,” Riku warned before he began to chug from his water bottle, desperately trying to wash the terrible texture out of his mouth. “I mean it.”</p>
<p>“Oh, I know, still worth it though” Vanitas continued to chuckle as he walked away back to his station, content with his prank and plotting who to get next. He did later rope Riku into convincing Lea to sample the “sorbet”. He didn’t trust anything Vanitas would give him, but Riku was more than happy to make others suffer the same way he had. There was no reason for Riku to trust Vanitas in the first place, only a week earlier he had come to Riku asking for chocolate to coat some cheap, used espresso pucks to trick some unfortunate soul into taking a bite. The shenanigans were funny when they didn’t involve Riku being the one to eat gross things. Everyone in the kitchen always took Riku very seriously, he was quiet and focused, blending into the background and staying unobtrusive and out of mind.</p>
<p>After dinner was over and most of the daytime kitchen staff had left for the evening, it was quiet again in the kitchen, just Mickey and Riku taking care of the baking that needed to be done for the days ahead. The quiet seemed less comforting now, more deafening without Sora there to tell him silly stories and generally brighten the kitchen with his laughter. Sora had been so excited about going on the canoe trip with his campers, he had talked non-stop about it in the week building to the four-day, three-night excursion to the nearby national park through the waterways connecting the lakes. Sora’s enthusiasm for the trip had been infectious but any enthusiasm Riku had held surrounding Sora’s trip had near-instantly disappeared upon Sora’s departure. It was scary how quickly Riku had grown used to the banter and liveliness Sora brought to the otherwise subdued kitchen. Mickey had never been one to force conversation, knowing that generally, Riku preferred to work in quiet and take the time for introspection. Riku let out a wistful sigh, drawing Mickey’s attention away from the cookie dough he was preparing to freeze.</p>
<p>“Is everything alright Riku?”</p>
<p>“Yeah, I’m fine, Mickey. It’s just- it’s just so quiet in here.”</p>
<p>“Well gosh Riku, we can always turn on some music or somethin’. You don’t usually mind the quiet.” Mickey offered, confused by Riku’s sudden concern for the lack of noise, but wanting to help all the same.</p>
<p>“It’s not the music…” Riku began at an audible level but his voice quickly descended into a mumble, “It’s just that Sora’s not here”</p>
<p>“What was that Riku? I couldn’t quite hear ya”</p>
<p>Riku let out a sigh and stared down at his flour-covered shoes, “I don’t like that it’s quiet because Sora isn’t here. I feel better when he’s here, lighter. N-not that you haven’t helped me! Just, when he’s around… it’s better.” Riku blushed at his admission, he hadn’t voiced his feelings about Sora aloud to anyone, not even himself. Mickey stepped towards Riku, reaching up to put a reassuring hand on his shoulder.</p>
<p>“Sometimes you care for somebody so much that other feelings disappear. And then there’s no room for fear or doubt.” Mickey spoke softly, catching Riku’s eye, “It’s okay for a certain person to help you feel better. As long as you realize you cannot rest the weight of your heart solely on them. Take the strength that Sora helps you feel and use it to build up yourself, and your support network.” Riku let out a soft sigh, his once rigid shoulders sagging as he let the breath out.</p>
<p>“You’re right Mickey…” He trailed off. “It wouldn’t be fair to expect Sora to carry me all by himself… he is the one always talking about how his friends give him support and help him to be better than he thought he could be. I guess being more like him wouldn’t be so bad.”</p>
<p>“Exactly! Sora can ground you but build your support network, so you aren’t left adrift when he isn’t here, like you are now. Maybe go see that Namine girl tomorrow, she seems like a nice young lady.”</p>
<p>And so Riku did. Namine was nice, quiet. She was the head of Arts and Crafts and spent much of her time in the Arts and Crafts cabin, leading kids through activities and coming up with new ones for them to engage in. Riku stopped by the cabin at a time he knew wouldn’t be too busy, after checking the daily activity sign-up sheets the kids filled out each day. She was sitting on a rug cross-legged as Riku walked in, absorbed in her sketching.</p>
<p>The best thing about Namine was that she was comfortable in silence, she didn’t feel the need to fill every single lull in conversation. Riku took some putty and began shaping it in his hands while he and Namine talked about the goings on around the camp, and the latest pranks between Hayner and Roxas. She had mentioned noticing Kairi and Olette spending more time together than usual and Riku made a mental note of it, always needing something to protect himself with the next time Kairi teased him about Sora. It was nice spending the afternoon with Namine, she was a calming presence and helped Riku forget about the lack of Sora in his day, at least for a little bit.</p>
<p>////</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The moment Sora arrived back from the canoe trip, Riku’s heart soared. Never before had seeing someone’s face brought so much joy to Riku. He ran to Sora, stopping just short of hugging him, unsure of how it would be received, Sora was always the one to initiate physical contact.</p>
<p>“Riku!!” A blinding smile broke out over Sora’s face as he brought Riku into a tight hug, completely overturning Riku’s internal deliberation. Riku’s body tensed for a moment before relaxing into the embrace, wanting to soak in every moment of contact that Sora would grant him. Sora let go far too soon but judging from the odd looks coming from the nearby campers the hug may have been a touch longer than was considered normal. A light blush dusted Riku’s face as he looked down at Sora, who was nearly vibrating with excitement,</p>
<p>“It’s good to see you again Sora. The kitchen was so peaceful while you were away, I got so much work done,” he teased lightly, smiling at the slight pout that grew on Sora’s face, poking at the upturned lower lip before he could think too hard about his actions, “I’m kidding. I missed you, dork.” Sora’s pout morphed into a wide smile and his eyes sparkled at Riku’s admission.</p>
<p>“I missed you too Riku! I have to make sure these guys put everything away properly and all that jazz but tomorrow after the kids all leave we all have a free night before the next group! Do you wanna come to a campfire with me and everyone? It’ll be lots of fun, I promise!” Sora gripped Riku’s hand in his, holding it to his heart as he all but pleaded for Riku to join him and his friends the following night. He had had fun with his group of campers on the trip, their shenanigans keeping him on his toes, vigilant for the possibility of an injury. But in the lulls in activity the only thing that occupied Sora’s mind was Riku. The way he would smile at Sora when he thought Sora wasn’t looking, the way he would laugh at Sora’s dumb jokes, which he only told half the time in order to hear that laugh, even the way he would knead dough, his strong arms flexing as he worked the dough into whatever shape he desired.</p>
<p>Sora had it bad for Riku. Riku was confusing though. One moment he was rushing towards Sora like he wanted nothing more than to scoop Sora up in his arms and never let go, the next he was tense, stilted, like he didn’t know how to act around Sora, then he’s back to hugging Sora like the world is going to end if he didn’t. Sora could wait until Riku figured out what he wanted though, it was better to wait than to blurt out a confession that wouldn’t be taken well and embarrass himself.</p>
<p>“Tomorrow night then.” Sora was shaken out of his internal turmoil by Riku’s response, “Feel free to come by the kitchen tonight if you have time too, Mickey’s missed you. He likes having someone that’s not me around to taste test.”</p>
<p>“Of course! I wouldn’t miss Mickey's baking for the world!”</p>
<p>Sora didn’t make it to the kitchen that evening, but Riku didn’t expect him to anyways. He usually spent the last night with his campers doing something with them and making the final day really memorable. Including the time he roped Kairi into letting the boys shoot apples off the top of his head. He was lucky not to lose an eye that day, but when he recounted the story back to Riku, he was nothing but smiles and laughs. The following evening came quickly, the morning passing by in a blur. As the sun started to set, Riku set out to the planned campfire site armed with mosquito repellent, a couple of beers, and marshmallows. He didn’t intend to get drunk, losing all inhibition was not a feeling Riku was fond of, but a couple of drinks socially would be fine.</p>
<p>The fire was already roaring as Riku climbed up the forested trail leading to a clearing where many of his new friends already sat, drinks in hand. A chorus of “Hey!”s and “Riku!”s sounded off as he came into view, the loudest of which coming from Sora and Kairi sat close to the fire. Riku left all but one of his drinks in the slowly filling cooler and sat on the log next to Kairi.</p>
<p>“How long have you guys been out here? <em>Someone</em> told me I didn’t have to be here ‘til sunset.” Riku side-eyed Sora, hoping that the instruction hadn’t made him late and look like a jerk. Kairi placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder.</p>
<p>“Don’t worry, Me and Sora and the others got here early to get the fire going and make sure everything was set up. There’s no set time for everyone to show up, lots of people won’t be here ‘til after dark.” Kairi smiled, “The fire was all me, but Sora’s good for carrying ice up here and collecting sticks,” she said teasingly.</p>
<p>“I gotta use these muscles for something!” Sora laughed and flexed dramatically, drawing Riku’s eyes straight to his now bulging biceps and causing a small blush to rise on his face. “I swear the kids are better at making fires than I am, I can just never get them to light! I don’t know how Kairi does it!” Kairi leaned over a gap in the logs to whisper conspiratorially in Riku’s ear,</p>
<p>“I use gasoline when he’s off gathering more wood for me, we’re not supposed to use accelerants in the fire but what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him,” Riku’s eyes widened as he looked back at the roaring fire, the size and ferocity suddenly making sense. Sora groaned beside them,</p>
<p>“Gimme a break Kairi! I wanna know the magic fire secret!”</p>
<p>“I’ll tell you when you’re older.”</p>
<p>“We are the same age!” Sora’s shoulders slumped in defeat, knowing he wouldn’t be getting an answer from Kairi any time soon. Kairi ruffled Sora’s hair as she stood up, taking the marshmallows from Riku’s hand and smiling.</p>
<p>“I’m going to take these to Olette, she mentioned wanting s’mores earlier and I won’t be the one to keep her waiting. You two behave now!” She warned with a wink. With Kairi gone, the boys chatted about what Sora had missed around the kitchen while he was gone, and about the mischief Sora’s campers had gotten into during the course of the canoe trip. Sora laughed so hard tears ran down his face when Riku recounted the story of Vanitas tricking him with the egg yolks, but the conversation slowly drifted into a comfortable silence as they sipped their drinks.</p>
<p>The sun had finally set, the stars were shining brightly overhead, and the clearing around the blazing fire was filled with camp and kitchen staff alike all absorbed in their own conversations, the noise a dull roar in the background. Sora stared into the fire blankly, looking lost in his own thoughts. Riku reached out to touch Sora’s shoulder softly, not wanting to startle him.</p>
<p>“Is everything okay, Sora?” He asked as Sora looked up from the fire, a vulnerability that Riku hadn’t seen before on his face.</p>
<p>“Do you think the kids will remember me? They’re here for such a short time and they might never come back again…” Sora trailed off, his voice barely above a whisper. “I try so hard to make their time here memorable, I want them to have the same happy memories that I do. I remember the name of every single camper I have, they’re all like younger siblings to me…” Sora turned to stare down at the ground and Riku took his hand in both of his.</p>
<p>“It doesn’t matter if they remember your name, or even your face Sora. The happiness you bring these kids in the time they’re here stays with them. You’ve guided them, taken care of them, and touched their hearts in a way that only you can. Even if you never meet again, you’ll remain in their hearts.” <em>You’re unforgettable Sora. </em>The final words left unspoken, for a fear they would reveal a part of Riku he wasn’t ready to voice aloud. Sora looked up at Riku with tears sparkling in his eyes, he scooted closer, took his hand out of Riku’s and slowly brought it around Riku’s waist. He leaned his head against Riku’s chest with a nearly unnoticeable thank you whispered into his shirt. Riku set down his drink and brought his arms around Sora, cradling him close and resting his chin on the top of Sora’s head. There was no force that could separate him from Sora at that moment, Sora had been a pillar of strength for Riku, the least he could do was to be the same for Sora, even if only for one night.</p>
<p>////</p>
<p>If Riku had hoped that he and Sora’s moment by the campfire had gone unnoticed by the others in attendance, he would have been out of luck. Most people elected not to comment on the display, though there was a smile from a passing Namine, and a ‘We’ll talk about this later’ look from Kairi. And oh did they talk about it later.</p>
<p>“Look, Kairi, I don’t like him like that. I don’t know where you got the idea, but I can admire someone without being romantically interested in them.” Riku said with a cool expression, careful not to get too passionate in response, lest Kairi think that he’s trying to hide something. Suddenly, Kairi let out a near earth-shattering sneeze, “Are you okay?”</p>
<p>“Sorry Riku, I guess being away from you for so long made me allergic to your bullshit,” Kairi cackled at the astonished expression on Riku’s face. She still knew him well, even after years apart. They were best friends, and a connection like that couldn’t be broken by any distance. It was so obvious that he was mooning over Sora every time he came near; it was a miracle that Sora didn’t notice. Not that Sora was always the most observant person. For someone who watched over groups of kids all day it was amazing what obvious thing could pass right under his nose. It’s not like Sora was any better when it came to mooning over Riku, that boy might as well have had wedding bells ringing in his head whenever he looked at Riku. If Kairi spent more time around Hayner, Pence, and Olette to escape the constant stream of “Did you see Riku’s arms today?” “I wonder what Riku’s doing today, do you think he’ll mind if I join him in the kitchen?” then who could blame her.</p>
<p>“Even <em>if</em> I liked him like that, it’s not like he would reciprocate. You’ve heard him talk about what a good friend I am! I don’t want to ruin it.” There was a finality in Riku’s voice like he had come to the conclusion that this was the only way some time ago. “We’re both going separate ways after the summer ends anyways.”</p>
<p>“So you and I can be friends for <em>years</em> long distance, but you can’t see your relationship lasting more than the summer with Sora? You’re being a hypocrite Riku.” The problem was that he could see them together for long after the summer, years in the future, getting married, buying a house together, having a life together. It was all too much far too soon and Riku didn’t want to get his heart broken over something that could end up only being a summer fling. “Riku, trust me. Sora isn’t the kind of guy who would hurt you. I’m sure it can be scary to love someone-</p>
<p>“I’m <em>not</em> in love with him Kairi” That may have come off a bit too defensive, but he wasn’t in love with Sora, he wasn’t. So what if Sora made him laugh like no one but Kairi could, or made him feel light in a way he hadn’t felt in years. Like the weight of his past was somehow less when Sora was near, and smiles came easier. Sora had ‘helped’ him decorate cupcakes a couple days after the campfire and it was probably the happiest Riku had felt in his life.</p>
<p>Sora’s eyes had lit up the moment Riku pulled out the cupcakes he had baked earlier in the afternoon. Those same eyes tracked Riku’s every movement as he filled piping bags with various colours of whipped cream and brought out a box of sprinkles. He was practically on the edge of his seat by the time he blurted out “Can I help you decorate?!” Riku laughed softly, a smile that was reserved only for Sora coming to his face as he said yes, handing Sora a filled piping bag without a second thought. He should have had a second thought. In very little time there was whipped cream and sprinkles covering both the counter and Sora.</p>
<p>“I think I’ve almost got the hang of this!” Sora crowed in success when he managed to get more cream on the cupcake than on himself. It was more than a little bit adorable. Little smudges of yellow and pink dotted his face, from the tip of his nose, somehow even on his eyelashes. Riku chuckled and swiped his thumb down the tip of Sora’s nose, taking the icing off and staring into his eyes and smiling softly, tenderly. The moment was impossibly long, Sora’s face grew redder by the second, a blush rising quickly and without remorse. Sora’s eyes flicked down towards Riku’s lips, breaking the eye contact, then back to his eyes in an instant.</p>
<p>Should he?</p>
<p>Does Sora want?</p>
<p>Is it worth it to take this chance?</p>
<p>Riku was so lost in his own head that he didn’t notice Sora slowly reaching to the side, his hand growing ever closer to the cupcakes. The only thing bringing him out of his internal deliberation was a cupcake shoved icing-first into his mouth, smearing whipped cream up(and into) his nose. <em>Oh</em>. Hmm. That… makes more sense than Sora wanting to kiss him. The cupcake fell to the ground with a <em>plop</em> and Riku stood still in a few more moments of shocked silence while Sora quickly danced away, laughing so hard that tears came to his eyes at the expression on Riku’s face.</p>
<p>The moment Riku finally gathered his wits again, he was on Sora in a flash, grabbing a handful of whipped cream from the mixing bowl and chasing after Sora, dodging around counters and mixers to corner him in the dish pit. He stalked forward slowly when Sora realized he was trapped, a dangerous smile on Riku’s face as he reached forward to smear whipped cream all over… nothing. Sora had slipped under Riku’s outstretched arm and began running to the opposite side of the kitchen. He hollered over his shoulder as he ran “I told ya I could be slippery!” His gloating would have been worth it too, if in that moment Riku hadn’t all but vaulted over the workstation separating them and misjudged where he would land. He caught the back of Sora’s knee, causing Sora to fall and Riku to fall with him. Riku wasted no time, as soon as he was on the ground with Sora he wiped his miraculously still whipped cream covered hand over Sora’s face and up into his hair. Never mind the fact that to be able to do so he had Sora pinned beneath him.</p>
<p>“Gotcha.” He said with a smirk, and Sora was thankful for the gunk covering his face because maybe, just maybe, it would hide his now returning blush. At least he could blame the heavy breathing on the running.</p>
<p>“What are you boys up to in here?” Came a call from across the kitchen, Mickey had returned from wherever he had disappeared to, and Riku became quickly aware of the slightly compromising position they were in, and of the mess they had made of the kitchen as they had chased each other around. He quickly sprang to his feet and looked around for the nearest sink to wash his hands and face off at,</p>
<p>“Nothing, Mickey! We’re just decorating cupcakes!” And each other. What was the difference, really? Sora and Riku looked at each other and burst into giggles. Very manly giggles, that did not have Mickey shaking his head at them when he saw the state they were in. The night wound down quickly after that, Sora retreating to shower and make sure his campers were where they were supposed to be after helping Riku decorate the remaining cupcakes, luckily only having lost the one. Riku’s good mood stayed the rest of the night, he felt free chasing Sora around the kitchen, like nothing could bring him down. He wanted to feel like that more.</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>Art by <a href="https://kampfhomo.tumblr.com/"><strong>Kampfhomo</strong></a></p>
<p>////</p>
<p>A small voice called out from the garage doors separating the kitchen from the dining hall. “Excuse me?” Shit, it was a kid. They usually saw a couple throughout the evening, generally looking for a bag of ice because someone fell, but Riku generally tried to avoid interactions with the campers, he didn’t mind kids but always felt awkward telling them no or interacting with them in general. Riku went to see what the kid wanted anyways, not wanting to ignore him in case it was something important. The one kid ended up being a group of four boys, looking at Riku with hopeful eyes. Their leader spoke again as they saw Riku. “Could you please put some hot chocolate powder out for us?” Oh. That wouldn’t have been a big deal if Riku hadn’t been instructed specifically <em>not</em> to do that just a few days before. The kids always left the coffee station a mess and everyone in the kitchen was tired of cleaning it up.</p>
<p>“I’m sorry guys, the head chef doesn’t want us putting it out at night because it always ends up making a huge mess.” Riku felt for the kids, but really didn’t want to end up being the one cleaning up the coffee station after the rest of the campers spotted the hot chocolate.</p>
<p>“Please? I promise if we make a mess we’ll clean it up!” They really wanted this hot chocolate, and Riku felt bad for them, but there’s still the matter of other kids seeing it.</p>
<p>“How about I make it for you guys?”</p>
<p>“Ohmygosh would you? You’re so nice mister! Thank you so much!” The kids all crowded into the coffee area only to sigh when they discovered the hot water tank empty. Riku sighed too, no one ever bothered to fill it after dinner. He told them to come back in ten minutes, when the newly filled water tank would have had time to heat up again. They thanked him again and went who knows where to wait, at least they weren’t still crowding. The ten minutes went fast, and Riku grabbed a pitcher and filled it with the powdered hot chocolate when he saw the boys return. There were a few young girls getting some water who became very interested when Riku emerged to fill up the pitcher with hot water, but he filled up the boy’s bottles first. They had been surprisingly polite and patient, though one of the smaller boys got a bit pushy when Riku started pouring. At one point he was shooed back by the kids, presumably to hide from a camp staff member that they didn’t want to see that they were getting hot chocolate, though Riku couldn’t quite make out what they were saying. He ended up making a second pitcher to give to some of the girls that wanted some too.</p>
<p>As hard as Riku tried though, the coffee counter still ended up a mess. How the kids (and adults) could make such a mess and not think to clean it up, Riku would never know. “Hey guys, if I give you some paper towel, could you wipe down the counter for me?” He might as well try to ask the kids to help out, it was hard to imagine that they could make any more of a mess, at least. They agreed with surprising enthusiasm and did a pretty decent job for what Riku assumed to be 9 or 10 year old boys. At some point in the hot chocolate fiasco, Sora had snuck into the kitchen with an unusual quiet and watched Riku help the kids with a soft look in his eye. The kids were still crowded around Riku,</p>
<p>“You’re so nice mister,” They spotted Sora behind Riku, “Isn’t he so nice, Sora?”</p>
<p>“Yeah,” Sora agreed with a soft affection in his voice and looked up to catch Riku’s eye with the same gentle affection, “He really is.”</p>
<p>“Is there anyone we can like, recommend you to?” The boys grabbed Riku’s attention away from Sora as best as they could, but most of his mind was still occupied with an affection that stunned him to see directed his way. “What’s your name? Can we like recommend you to someone? You’re so nice and helpful!” Odd words for a kid, but between Sora and the general good feeling of being given recognition, Riku didn’t think too hard on it.</p>
<p>“Riku. My name's Riku. I guess you could talk to Mickey, if you wanted?” It’s not like he could really get a raise or a promotion, but the kids really wanted to tell someone how great they thought he was, and who was he to stop them.</p>
<p>“Is that the really short guy?” Riku laughed a little at the description,</p>
<p>“Yeah, he's the short guy.”</p>
<p>The rest of the night passed normally, though try as he might Riku couldn’t shake the affection he saw in Sora’s eyes, it felt like something that shouldn’t be meant for him, it didn’t feel like something he deserved. Maybe the affection was for the kids Riku was helping, though that didn’t seem right. The kids knew Sora, but so did most campers, and Sora would have been more involved if they were his campers. Against all odds, that warmth must have been for Riku, and he would treasure it like nothing else.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Watching Riku interact with the campers filled Sora’s heart with so much love it felt like it was about to burst. He had always complained that he felt awkward around the kids and didn’t know how to interact with them, but here he was showing them so much compassion and kindness over something as small as wanting hot chocolate. Sora had already been weak for Riku, but seeing him around kids only made it so much worse. How was he supposed to resist kissing the daylights out of him when he was showing so much of his heart? It just wasn’t fair.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>////</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Coliseum tournament was fast approaching, and Sora’s growing excitement was infectious. Ever since the Cupcake Incident ™ (which had been decided to be a tie) became a competition. Races to grab a tool that Riku needed, who could lift the most bags of flour,</p>
<p>“I need to fill the flour bin, I’ll be right back.”</p>
<p>“I bet I could carry two bags of flour back here without breaking a sweat!” Riku won, carrying three of them over his shoulder, even who could do the most squats in a minute. It was ridiculous, but so much fun. The glee on Sora’s face when he won, the determination in his eyes when he lost, every expression entrancing Riku even more. His infatuation never stopped him from trying his hardest to best Sora, the competitions got his blood pumping. They made him feel carefree like the young adult he was, rather than mature beyond his years and restrained like he was more often than not. These little competitions would culminate in Sora and Riku facing off in The Coliseum, and what a match it would be, as they were tied 13-13.</p>
<p>It was <em>hot</em> that day. Late July and the sun beating down overhead, cicadas screaming in the distance, but competition waits for no man. After slathering himself in sunscreen – because neither Sora nor Kairi would let him live it down if he got sunburnt – and dressing in the coolest clothes he could reasonably sword fight in, Riku walked up to the field the tournament was being held in. Campers of all ages were sat in the grass on the outskirts of the field, eager to watch the annual competition and to watch the staff they looked up to make fools of themselves. Within the circle of children was a group of camp staff warming up and stretching, some even having small practice spars with each other to loosen up. On the opposite end of the field, Riku spotted Sora laughing with Roxas and peeling off an already sweat-damp tank top. Oh. Welp, any concentration Riku had for the day was now swiftly flying out the window. Goodbye Riku’s concentration! Sora was tanned, his body a study in contradictions; smooth but angular, all sharp lines and soft masculinity. Riku was fucked. And that’s when Sora spotted him. Sora waved and called to him and how was Riku supposed to approach him when his entire face was as red as Lea’s hair?</p>
<p>Some sort of deity had it out for him. That must have been why the very hot -literally and figuratively- Sora began to jog over to where Riku was standing with mouth agape.</p>
<p>“You feeling okay Riku? You look kinda red. You better not be trying to get out of our match!” Sora leaned close, standing on his tip-toes and inspecting Riku’s reddened face, looking for some sign that Riku was sick.</p>
<p>“Uh- I’m fine Sora, must just be from the sun, it’s pretty hot out today,” Riku did his best to step back and subtly put a bit more distance between their faces, his arm coming up to scratch the back of his head awkwardly. Sora laughed.</p>
<p>“Alright then, just make sure you don’t pass out on us! I already have to remind the campers to stay hydrated, I shouldn’t have to remind you too.” Sora explained how the tournament system worked as they walked over to Pence, who was handling most of the organization of the event, alongside Olette. The fights were organized in a series of brackets, with everyone who wanted to compete given a chance, but still done so that there would only be one winner. Later in the day there was time set aside for those who wanted to specifically go up against each other but weren’t matched up in the brackets. The later fights were more about fun than winning, but most were there to have fun anyways. Winning would just be an added bonus. Matches ended when one party conceded or when the judges decided there was a clear winner, or it would be unsafe to continue. It definitely wasn’t the safest camp pass time, but it was a tradition at this point, and the kids loved watching. No one had ever been seriously injured, so the sparring portion of the games were allowed to continue.</p>
<p>The first few matches Riku fought in weren’t anything special, he was up against camp staff that he didn’t know well, only just being able to match faces to names. The first couple brackets of the qualifying matches were fought simultaneously, each with its own referee watching over with a careful eye, to speed up the process so that they didn’t take up the whole day. A few of the matches were notable, such as when one of the outdoor survival staff, Marluxia, threw dandelions at Riku to distract him (the field was only grass, where did he get dandelions?), or when the water activity coordinator, Demyx, resorted to spraying him with a water gun to avoid close combat. It made Riku’s white shirt cling to his skin, but the cool water felt good under the hot sun, despite the ridiculousness of the tactic. Any time Sora wasn’t fighting, Riku could feel his eyes on him. Hotter than the sun bearing down overhead, Sora’s eyes focused on Riku’s every movement like there was a target on his back. His eyes stayed on Riku, not straying even when it was announced that he and Riku would be competing against each other next.</p>
<p>Their fight was electric. The usual competitions they had didn’t bring out a fraction of this energy from them. More than a fight, it felt like a dance, carefully choreographed so neither of them faltered nor gained advantage over the other. They were equal in skill, if not in strength and maneuverability. Riku was stronger, but Sora was quicker, reacting before Riku had even moved. It was playful in a way, a fierce smile on both of their faces as they exchanged blows, trying to find ways to trip the other up. The world narrowed down to just the two of them, the cheers of their friends and the crowd drowned out by their laser focus on the other. Possibly a bit too laser-focused if the way Riku noticed individual droplets of sweat running down Sora’s chest were any indication. Riku’s mind was at war with itself, every little distraction, like the way Sora’s eyes looked in the sunlight, or the grace with which he moved quickly overtaken by the competitive need to win and settle the score, which was then washed away by the sheer beauty of Sora’s smile when he was gaining on Riku. Everything about the fight was thrilling. At least it was until Riku tripped backward over a stray rock in the field, hitting the ground hard. Sora stepped over him and tilted his chin up with his wooden sword,</p>
<p>“Do you yield?” He asked with a smirk that looked both wholly out of place and much too right on his face. Riku blamed the blush that rose to his face on the exertion of the fight, or he tried to at least. He probably could have gotten up and continued the match, any pain from the fall quickly fading, but in that moment, he decided not to. Sora would not be a gracious winner in any way and would certainly find ways to lord it over Riku for who knows how long, but for a moment, that didn’t matter.</p>
<p>“I yield.” The crowd erupted into both cheers and sighs of dismay, and Sora’s cocky smirk turned into a brilliant smile. He reached out a hand to help Riku up from the ground and as their hands clasped, he pulled Riku up with slightly too much force, and Riku came right up, their foreheads bashing against each other, and their lips meeting harshly. If Sora’s shirtless chest hadn’t short circuited Riku’s brain earlier, this had. Something so rough had no right to feel so good, so right. Time stood still, and the sounds of the crowd were drowned out by the blood rushing through Riku’s body in exhilaration. Sora’s lips were slightly chapped and unmoving, frozen in shock. This realization brought Riku back to awareness, the moment catching back up with him. He broke away and turned to run, to put distance between himself and Sora, sure that Sora would reject him as soon as they were out of the spotlight. Pence was making an announcement through a loudspeaker, though Riku could not make out what he was saying, panic rushing through him.</p>
<p>“Riku, wait!” Sora called out and ran after him. Riku slowed by a fraction, the desperation in Sora’s voice leading him to think maybe he shouldn’t be running away. He should hear Sora out. The absolute worst thing that could happen is that he loses Sora as a friend, and that was guaranteed if he cut Sora out because of embarrassment. He could handle a broken heart if it meant Sora would stay in his life. Riku would move on eventually. <em>He wouldn’t</em>. The loneliness from before was worse than heartbreak could ever be.</p>
<p>Sora caught up, grabbing Riku’s hand and tugging him back to look him in the eyes. Sora’s eyes were rimmed with red, beginning to puff up from unshed tears.</p>
<p>“I’m sorry- “They both started, looking at the other in shock.</p>
<p>“It was an accident, I didn’t mean to, it wasn’t the right moment,” Sora explained hastily</p>
<p>“I’m so sorry, I never wanted to make you uncomfortable.” Riku rambled on, not taking in any of Sora’s words.</p>
<p>“Uncomfortable...?” Sora’s eyebrows knit together in confusion.</p>
<p>“I knew Kairi was wrong, I can’t believe I fell in- I had a crush on the first straight guy that talked to me. Please don’t hate me, I don’t want to lose you as a friend… the right moment?” Riku’s panicking mind finally caught up to Sora’s words.</p>
<p>“I’ve been into you since we met, Riku! Kai was always teasing that I was being super obvious about it. I was starting to think that you were really just not interested.”</p>
<p>“But you were still going to kiss me ‘at the right moment’?” A small smile crept its way onto Riku’s face, panic subsiding into amusement for a moment.</p>
<p>“I’m only human, ‘Ku. I knew I couldn’t resist you forever… it’s honestly a miracle I lasted this long.” In the distance, a roaring cheer sounded off in the distance<em>, a new match had just ended. </em>“We should probably head back…” Sora sighed and ran a hand through his hair, “Can we talk later? The others will be wondering where we went…”</p>
<p>“Yeah, later is good. Meet me in the kitchen?” With that they returned to the field, walking close, their hands brushing hesitantly. They never joined hands, but maybe, they both hoped, maybe soon they would. They made it back to the crowds as the final match began. Kairi vs. Roxas. Sora had to let out a laugh at that one. Kairi had been itching to beat Roxas for years, since they had been campers and everyone, save for Kairi, had agreed that Roxas was the strongest of their friend group. It was a grudge match many years in the making, and the tension alone should have been enough to keep Sora’s focus. His thoughts, however, would not stop straying to the softness of Riku’s lips, the surprise in his green eyes, and the conversation to come. Had Sora been able to come out of his own head, he would have noticed the scared but hopeful glances Riku would shoot his way every so often, equally wrapped up in his own thoughts and worries.</p>
<p>He couldn’t be sure how it happened, with his attention elsewhere, but Kairi had won the match, but by the heaving of her breath and the bruises littering her arms, it was only by the smallest of margins. Seeing his best friend victorious, Sora leaped up, everything but his excitement leaving his mind for the moment, Kairi’s victory deserved his full attention. He was the first one rushing towards her, hefting her up over his shoulder and shouting in elation.</p>
<p>“I told you he wasn’t the strongest!” Kairi laughed as Sora lifted her up, then quietly she whispered in Sora’s ear, “Is everything okay with Riku? What happened after he ran?” A light blush dusted Sora’s features.</p>
<p>“I’m not sure yet… I’ll let you know later?”</p>
<p>“You better mister!” She wagged her finger in his face, “Now let me down!”</p>
<p>
  <em>////</em>
</p>
<p>After the sparring tournament Sora had to return to his usual duties with his campers, and Riku had to shower and start his work for the day. He had listened to Mickey and added his two cents when it came to making up the to-do list for the day, but other than that he worked in a daze, going through the motions of work on autopilot. Time was moving at both a snail's pace but in a blur as well. The thought that Sora might like Riku back uplifted him, but the worries and doubts of things he did not and could not know weighed down on him. Forever had passed in a flash by the time the clock struck ten oh five and Sora came scrambling into the kitchen. He was breathing like he had run from the opposite end of the camp. He was bent over at the waist, panting and holding onto Riku’s shoulder and with no preamble jumped right to the heart of Riku’s worries.</p>
<p>“I’m not always the best with words but… I really like you Riku…” Sora looked up into Riku’s eyes hopefully, “You make me laugh, and you’re so strong, physically but emotionally too. There’s a kindness in your heart that can’t be ignored. And I want… well I mean if you want… will you maybe please be my boyfriend? I know we can’t really go out on dates but just spending-“</p>
<p>“Yes, um, yeah, Sora, I’ll be your boyfriend. I’m happy to just be around you too. You make me want to be strong.” Suddenly, Riku was yanked down by Sora throwing his arms around his neck and pulling him down into a kiss, and Riku felt all the tension of the day leave his body. He felt weightless, Sora liked him; wanted to be with him, if not for Sora holding him close, he might not have believed it. He still wasn’t sure he deserved Sora’s affection, but maybe things would be okay.</p>
<p>
  <em>////</em>
</p>
<p>Nothing much had really changed once Sora and Riku were officially together. Sora still came to the kitchen at night when he could, and Riku would hang out with Sora &amp; co. in the staff cabin when he could. He didn’t always talk or participate in shenanigans, but just to sit next to Sora and be in his presence was soothing when his mind was agitated. And it was agitated often. He felt so happy that it scared him. What had he done to earn something so purely, unabashedly good in his life? And what would happen at the end of the summer when they had to go back home? It was a question they needed to talk about, but Riku feared the answer, so he refused to bring it up, if only to keep the bubble of happiness that surrounded them whole just a little longer.</p>
<p>Riku seemed… quieter since he and Sora had officially gotten together. He still shot those small smiles at Sora, the ones that took his breath away, and he still joked around with Sora, they had even sat out in the grass at night and watched the stars, but there were moments where he seemed far away, a sad smile on his face like he was already mourning something not yet come to pass. Sora didn’t want to pry though, Riku had always been quiet, maybe Sora was just noticing it more now that he felt he was allowed to notice all of Riku. If there was something really bothering him, he would bring it up eventually. At least, Sora hoped he would. He wanted to help if there was something on Riku’s mind, but he couldn’t help if he didn’t know what was going on.</p>
<p>Quiet Riku lasted about two weeks before Sora got worried enough to ask if he was okay. There was no way Sora could continue to let it be when Namine was coming up to him one day at lunch to ask if Riku was doing okay. An answer of “Oh well, you know Riku,” did exactly nothing to soothe either of their worries, and Sora knew it was time to talk to him. Not to confront, just to gently look for answers. It could genuinely be nothing… but what if it wasn’t? What if Riku regretted everything and just didn’t know how to say it? What if he thought Sora was too much, too clingy? The only way to know was to ask, no matter how terrifying the thought of it was. He just needed the right opportunity.</p>
<p>That opportunity came faster than expected, Mickey had the day off, so it was just Sora and Riku in the kitchen that evening. Riku was beginning to portion a batch of bread and Sora knew it was his chance. “Hey Riku, can I ask you something?”</p>
<p>“Anything.” The answer was instantaneous, no thought spared for giving Sora anything but his entire being.</p>
<p>“Why… why’ve you been so quiet since we started dating? You don’t regret saying yes to me… do you?” The questions sparked an immediate panic in Riku’s eyes, his movements halting as his mind scrambled, trying to find the words to reassure Sora.</p>
<p>“No! I could never… The last two weeks with you have been incredible Sora, there’s no way I could ever regret saying yes to you. I just-“He cut himself off, his mind and his heart at war over how much to say, how much he could say without alienating Sora.</p>
<p>“You just...?”</p>
<p>“I… what’s going to happen at the end of the summer? We both have to go home and we’re going to be so far apart…”</p>
<p>“We’re going to do whatever we want Riku. Long-distance can be hard, but we can make it work. You’ve stayed friends with Kairi since she moved, haven’t you? It’ll be difficult sometimes, but I really like you Riku and I’m willing to try if you are.”</p>
<p>“You’d want to stay with me?”</p>
<p>“Um, yeah? Distance is supposed to make the heart grow fonder, right? We can do it if we try! Assuming you want to…”</p>
<p>“I want to! I just don’t know what I can do for you from all the way in Radient Garden.”</p>
<p>“You don’t have to do anything for me though? I’d like it if you would talk to me and listen in return, that is kind of the basis of a relationship and all, but you don’t have to do things for me for me to like you? It wouldn’t be fair to you if I only liked what you could do for me. I like you for you, Riku.” Riku’s eyes were glassy with unshed tears, looking down at Sora with awe in his eyes. When had anyone aside from Kairi really liked him just as a person?</p>
<p>“I don’t deserve you…”</p>
<p>“You do though, Riku. You deserve to be happy; I want you to be happy. You make me happy. So if us being together makes you happy, then we can do this!”</p>
<p>“You make me so happy Sora, I can’t even…”</p>
<p>“Good! Then let yourself be happy with me and we can make this work! I won’t be in school this year so maybe we could even visit each other sometime, and even if we can’t we can video call and do dates like that. We can do this Riku, we just have to try.” Riku held Sora’s hands in his own and brought one up to brush his lips against Sora’s knuckles,</p>
<p>“I want to try for you, for us…” I’m still working through some stuff and I hope you’ll be here to listen when I’m ready to talk about it.</p>
<p>Sora could still see fear behind Riku’s eyes but as long as they were both willing to try, Sora knew they could overcome any obstacle. He brought his and Riku’s joined hands around Riku’s neck to pull him down into a soft kiss, trying to pour all of his love and faith into the gentle press of his lips. They would do this together.</p>
<p>////</p>
<p>
  <em> Many years later...</em>
</p>
<p>Sora fussed over the purple duffel bag, checking for the tenth time that everything his daughter would need for the coming two weeks was packed. Bug spray? Check. Sunscreen? Check. Anti itch cream for when she inevitably gets bitten by bugs anyways? Check. A warm hand slid down his back and came around his waist to embrace him, “She’s going to be okay love.” The deep, rich voice he’d loved for years trying to reassure him. “I’m sure if you managed to survive going to camp for your entire childhood, she’ll survive going for two weeks.”</p>
<p>“This is her first time though Riku! What if she hates it and wants to come home right away? I’m not strong enough to tell her no!” Sora’s eyes widened as he spun in Riku’s embrace, arms flailing to prove his point.</p>
<p>“Sora. I may have only been a baker but I know for a fact that that is what the counselors are there for. It was literally your job to help the kids that felt like that. She’s not going to hate it anyways, she’s so excited to go to the camp her dad and papa met at.” Riku ruffled Sora’s hair gently, wedding ring glinting in the sunlight streaming through the window and kissed his forehead tenderly, “She’s going to be okay Sor, she’s too much like you not to be.”</p>
<p>“Hey! What’s that supposed to mean?” Riku laughed at Sora’s outraged expression, he never could get enough of riling him up.</p>
<p>“Nothing, love. Just that you’re strong.”</p>
<p>“That’s what I thought you meant, you meanie.” One could never be too careful with their language with a little one around. Sora stuck his tongue out at Riku and turned to zip up the duffel bag for the final time when a small voice called out from down the stairs,</p>
<p>“Daaaaaaaad! Papaaaaaaaa! Hurry up! It’s time to go to camp!” With one last peck to the back of Sora’s head, he called back to their daughter,</p>
<p>“We’re coming sweetheart!” He stopped in the doorway to watch Sora sling the bag over his shoulder, “Why are you worrying, anyways? We’re going to be there with her, mister camp nurse.” Sora just laughed sheepishly and grabbed Riku’s arm, leading him down the stairs to their excited daughter. He would have never guessed that they would end up here when he had first laid eyes on Riku all those years ago, but he wouldn’t change it for the world.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thanks so much for reading!! If you want, leave me a kudos or comment, I will respond to comments with probably too many emojis and excitement. You can find me on tumblr at <a href="https://fr0sted-fox.tumblr.com/">fr0sted-fox</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
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